When we have issues concerning our mental health and well being, in my opinion we are either acting out of mental illness or awareness.
Awareness only comes with diagnosis, treatment and therapeutics.
I am not a doctor, therapist or a counselor but I have seen and been treated by all three in my journey through life and am a better man for it.
In fact, I was released seventeen years ago last month from an N.I.H. facility directly across the street from where Senator Fetterman sought treatment last night and is currently being helped to deal with depression.
It took a lot of courage and bravery to do what Fetterman did: he inadvertently may have saved hundreds of lives by providing an example to others that there is no shame in seeking help for mental health issues.
Mental hygiene is at a crisis point in the United States - and for good reason.
We have collectively experienced trauma; more than a few of us are surely suffering from PTSD as a result of not only the global pandemic but the political upheaval, criminality and open hatred towards anyone deemed unworthy of protection and support from a burgeoning fascist movement in the United States.
We see wave after wave of tragedy on a global scale, caused by both climate change and war.
Russia is using human rights atrocities as a strategy in a war that is mostly aimed at women and children, as their soldiers are woefully outmatched by the fiercely skilled Ukrainian army.
If you’re the kind of person who feels empathy for fellow sentient beings these are not easy days; if you have any sort of history with PTSD, opportunities for triggering occur on a daily basis. Overwhelming thoughts can build up quickly…clinical depression is a deadly disease.
I sought treatment for substance abuse issues, spent a month at the NIAAA and it saved my life.
In the course of my stay there a young man took his own life about a week before Christmas.
I will spare you the details but it was something that I and some fellow patients witnessed.
We were in a ward that dealt specifically with alcoholism - it happened on the campus - we did not know the young man but the trauma his family surely endured was heartbreaking.
As we were temporarily locked down in our wing after his death, a fellow patient asked if he could have a smoke outside.
When told the campus was on lockdown, the patient replied “but that happened on the mental health side” to which his response was, “What do you think you are being treated for?”
It was one of those ‘lightbulb moments’ for me where I saw the disease that I had been in denial about - destructive drinking - medically diagnosed as alcoholism, was not something I should be ashamed of seeking treatment for.
Had I been a diabetic I surely would feel no shame taking insulin. Why should treatment for alcoholism be any different?
Thankfully, it’s a spiritual malady of sorts married with a physical allergy, meaning if I don’t drink I have a chance at recovery - but only a daily reprieve, based on how well I maintain my spiritual condition.
Often this involves ‘outside help’ as they refer to it in twelve-step programs.
How fortunate I was to come to understand that my mental hygiene was not something to feel shame about - but something to work towards on a daily basis, to maintain the gift I had been given of surviving something that most do not.
I grew up with parents in addiction - the struggles I have seen over my lifetime are many - but what a blessing to know there is a solution. It was put to me in stark terms by an addiction counselor on my last day at the treatment center.
He told me to look out the window at the wing across the way. It was a pediatric oncology ward. I had seen it’s young patients full of brave smiles over the Christmas holiday visiting with their families.
While I got to leave that day, the counselor said to me “what do you think the parents of those children would say if I was to go into the rooms and tell them their child could walk out of here today - with their fatal disease in full remission - if they were to join a recovery group, work twelve steps and share honestly about their daily struggles with another person…do you think they would take that deal? You BOTH have fatal diseases - more folks die every year from your disease than theirs, that’s why we study it.”
When it was presented to me in those terms I got it. All denial slipped away about how close I had come to losing my battle.
Many never get that chance and don’t find their way into recovery.
The same can sadly be said for depression and mental health issues.
Suicide amongst veterans is at a staggering high: we lose brave men and women who served our country on a daily basis because they do not seek the help they need in time or face long waits at VA hospitals.
We have a crisis of mental health and access to treatment - it’s something the Biden administration is addressing.
I don’t know the specifics of Senator Fetterman’s condition and I am not presuming his condition involved any sort of suicidal ideations.
Most likely he preempted a lot of suffering; as in my experience, depression can be a progressive illness and is a lot more treatable at the onset when symptoms can still be relatively mild, as opposed to the debilitating acuteness they can metastasize into later.
Seeking treatment is brave and a wonderful example - especially knowing Fetterman is likely to receive criticism and most likely mockery from the trolls and pundits that now make up the modern conservative movement.
Toxic masculinity is their brand image, even though we all know it’s an outmoded and downright silly thing to aspire to for any evolved being. Senator John Fetterman already gave us a masterclass in bravery by showing up to his debates knowing his slick and snarky opponent would use his recovery from a stroke against him.
He did it anyway and gave America a good lesson in what manhood can really mean - compassion and self-care, patience with oneself and allowing space to heal and recover.
It also brought up elements of ableism that still reside on both sides of the aisle that should be illuminated and overcome if we are going to aspire to a truly representative democracy.
It took humility and self-awareness to seek help - I wish the Senator a speedy recovery.
If you are struggling with any mental health issues or with addiction and substance abuse there is a lot of hope and recovery - there is no reason to think you are alone or to suffer in silence.
It’s also a blessing not only to your own family to seek help; in Fetterman’s case, I believe it is honoring the faith and trust his constituents put in him.
He is treating his depression as any person should, by seeking medical help.
My only wish is that he inspires many others.
What a gift to have the real awareness of blessings right in front of us. We all are work in progress in some way✌️💓
It’s hard to find the right words of how your words often touch me. It’s clear from reading the messages here, you touch a lot of hearts. Thanks will have to do for now. It’s actually easier to shoulder the troubles when you know you are not alone in the struggles. I love it when Joe says, “together we can do anything”. So true. 🙏✌️